I'm typing this without being completely sure where it will go, hence the title. There has been so much about bullying lately, in the news and on my mind, and as I sit down to write this all I really know is that I wish it would stop.
I'm sure most people have heard by now about Jamey Rodemeyer, the fourteen-year-old boy who recently committed suicide after being bullied. Jamey was a big fan of Lady Gaga, who dedicated a song to his memory at a recent concert. Jamey was bullied because of his sexuality, and had actually posted a video on the "It Gets Better" project, a project dedicated to helping GLBTQ teens who may be considering suicide because of their sexuality and/or because of bullying. Unfortunately, for Jamey it never will get better. He chose to end his life because he saw no other way to end the bullying.
And the bullying still hasn't ended. Even though Jamey's gone, the bullies have now moved on to his sister, telling her things like, "We're glad Jamey's dead." Who does that kind of thing?!? Seriously, I wish I understood the mindset of someone who would say something that incredibly cruel. If there's anything there to understand.
Bullying hurts. It isn't something "you get over." I'm forty-one years old, and I'm not over the bullying I endured in middle and high school. I've accepted that it happened and I've moved on, but I'm not over it. Some of the things the bullies told me about myself have stuck with me, and they said it so often that it's hard for me to believe sometimes that I'm not fat, that I'm not worthless, that I shouldn't be dead. Yeah, they told me I should be. And I tried.
There are bullies everywhere. Not only kids, not only in schools. Adults bully other adults in the workplace all the time. Adults bully kids sometimes, for that matter. I don't understand what makes someone want to hurt others so much, and I don't know that it's anything that could ever be explained. What I do know is that it doesn't have to happen. All it takes is making a choice not to insult someone that day. Or to report bullying if you see it.
Too many people are being bullied. And too many people are dying because of it.