Friday, May 11, 2012

Fear



Being scared is just part of life, right?

Yes. If you don't let it hinder you from doing things. From moving forward. Take me, for example, I have this insane fear of tornadoes. I live in an area that rarely sees twisters forming, but yet when a thunderstorm begins, I sit and watch the Weather Channel. There have been a few times I ran into the basement, which is the safest room in the house you know. But recently, I've been dealing with another type of fear. The fear of putting myself and my ideas out into the world.

Although I have been working on my manuscript for two years, I have told very few people about it because I have been so afraid of having people judge me and tell me that I am not good enough. That ended a few weeks ago with my winning a query critique. This was the push I needed.

I wrote my query. And then I wrote it again. And then yet again. At the last minute I rewrote the entire thing and pushed send. For the next few days, I questioned my sanity for this. There is no way my query was going to cut the mustard! As I sit here eagerly awaiting a professional's thoughts and ideas, I know that if I hadn't pushed past this fear, I wouldn't have done the following things: tell a mom at baseball that I am writing a book, tell a few kids at school that I am writing a book, have the courage to continue on this journey.

I know that I am not perfect. I know my writing is FAR from perfect. I KNOW that I have stories to tell. I won't let fear put a damper on my dreams of sharing my stories with others. I can't. I won't. But it is a struggle. One that I will constantly battle. But for now, I will close my eyes and take a leap of faith.

How do you push past this fear with your writing?

1 comment:

  1. I have that same fear of tornadoes, except we do get them (I'm in NC). Currently licking my own wounds on a rejection right now, but you're right--putting yourself out there, making yourself vulnerable, is really scary. It's also necessary to most good things in life.

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